By the time you’re done reading this sentence, you probably could have finished listening to the Circle Jerks “Group Sex” (assuming you got distracted halfway through the sentence to go play The Sand Game).

Finishing in just under 16 minutes, “Group Sex” is a classic that probably doesn’t need any introduction. Released in 1980, the Circle Jerks blaze through “Group Sex” with furious (yet melodic) hardcore punk rock.

A classic that should be part of everyone’s collection.

MP3:
Circle Jerks – Live Fast Die Young
Circle Jerks – Don’t Care

Also Read:
The Steal
Best 20 Songs that Finish Under 35 Seconds
The Adolescents
The Most Uncomfortable Interview Ever (with Henry Rollins)

Buy:
Official Site

It amazes me that some people don’t get Good Clean Fun, let alone some overly serious hardcore kids take offense to the band. “How dare they make a mockery of the sacred ground of hardcore! I’m going to practice my judo with my crew now.”

Known for poking fun at every cliche that hardcore (and goths, and punk, and everything else in life) has become, DC’s Good Clean Fun re-union album “Between Christian Rock and a Hard Place” was relatively low key when it was released in 2006, but any fan of old school hardcore or anyone who needs a breathe of fresh air from the all too serious genre of hardcore should pick this up.

MP3:
Good Clean Fun – A Little Bit Emo, A Little Bit Hardcore
Good Clean Fun – Between Christian Rock and A Hard Place

Good (Semi) Clean Fun Articles:
The Steal
Good Clean Fun Haiku
Braindead

Buy:
Good Clean Fun

It amazes me that anyone actually celebrates Columbus Day (and I’m Italian too…)

Oh well, hope you all conquer a small country and nearly wipe out an entire tribe in honor of today!

MP3:
Crucial Unit – Columbus Fest is a Celebration of Genocide

Buy:
Crucial Unit

A friend and I had a punk rock radio show back when we were in college. We had a total of two listeners… Me and him (and not always either… seriously). Like most music snobs, I completely hate the radio (but like parenthesis). For some reason, punk bands like to sing about the radio quuuiite a bit, I’m guessing it’s a Sylvester-Tweety bird situation. Pursue it, but you’re never going to get it.

Nonetheless, without further ado, here are the 15 greatest punk songs about the radio (since they’ll never be on there).

15. The Ataris – The Radio Still Sucks

Back when I used the cd player in my car, I put the default station to A.M static so I didn’t have to hear any crap for the 15 seconds it took to switch cds. Yes, I am better than you.

14. Authority Zero – Mexican Radio

An amazing cover, yet why doesn’t anyone sing about being on a Canadian Radio…

eh?

13. Against All Authority – Radio Waves

Remember when ska was once on the radio? Thank god that’s over. Probably the only thing both I and everyone who hates ska can agree with. Nothing worse then a bunch of 11 years old telling everyone that Reel Big Fish invented ska.

12. The Arrogant Sons of Bitches – Radio Single

With a chorus that yells “I can’t wait to be a rockstar so I can do lots of drugs”, I’m pretty sure that if A.S.O.B were still around, they’d be on their way to stardom right now.

11. Ramones – Do You Remember Rock’ n Roll Radio

Nope. Just the sweet sound of AM static.

10. Leftover Crack – Clear Channel (Fuck Off)

Not completely about radio, but since Clear Channel does own about like 99.999999%of all radio stations (and tv, advertising, your mom’s soul)…

9. Rancid – Radio Havana

Great, now we have Cuban radio… where the hell is that damn Canadian radio?!

8. NOFX – Please Play This Song On The Radio

Nine years ago, this song always used to crack me up… seeing as I have matured quite a bit, I still crack up when listening to this song.

7. Rancid – Radio

What station did they find that gives them so much bliss? (clue: It probably only had “And Out Come the Wolves” on rotation).

6. Blanks 77 – Radio Hits

…And is arrested for assault.

5. Bouncing Souls – Sing Along Forever

I’m going to need a lot of Fisherman’s Friend then…

4. Bouncing Souls – Private Radio

2 Souls songs back to back? This list is FIXED!

3. Osker – Radio

Wow, I remember listening to this song during my (more) angsty days, walking around my campus at 3 am. Ahh the memories.

2. Teenage Bottlerocket – Radio

Man… those three chords. Hooked everytime.

1. Dillinger Four – O.K.F.M.D.O.A

COME ON!

More Lists. Everyone likes lists:

Top 5 Most Overrated Bands of all time

Best 4 Stand Up Comedians

5 Greatest Acoustic Songs (although… I did forget one very important one)

Best 20 Songs that finish under 35 Seconds

Greatest 5 Punk Songs By Bands You’ve Never Heard Of

Buy:
Interpunk.com

Waaaaait a second… you’re telling me that this blood curling screaming in UK’s Rolo Tomassi is NOT a banshee being beaten with a wire coat hanger, but is actually human? And then you’re going to tell me it’s a girl doing all this? I think I need to lie down.

The experimental music could best be described as somewhere between heavy hardcore and an orgy in the 8th layer of hell. While I couldn’t really get into some of their more experimental songs, the majority of their debut “Hysterics” (released just last month) is really creepy hardcore. Taking cues from Horse the Band and Converge, Rolo Tomassi is definitely a promising act, and the fact that the average age for the members is 18 years old, just goes to show the potential they have.

MP3:
Rolo Tomassi – Abraxas
Rolo Tomassi – I Love Turbulance

DIY Break Your Own Skull:
Witch Hunt
Disfear
Raised Fist

Buy:
Hassle Records

Ok, I usually don’t make political posts, but last night I watched some of the debates, and learned something: Complete contrived, saturated, bullshit… Both McCain and Obama.

I had to turn the debate off in disgust. They don’t even let these candidates debate, it’s just them stating their stance on a few planted, pre-approved questions that a third grader could answer. Asking Obama “if health insurance should be a commodity” is like asking a porn star if they believe in censorship. Anytime the candidates would even attempt to start a real debate, the moderator cuts them off.

My solution? Let’s do it like a townhouse meeting those crazy British folks love. Have anyone ask any question they want, without being “pre-approved”.

We need people to call these candidates out on their crap: McCain is against net neutrality, so bye bye non-corporate websites (including Housewives). Obama preaches about how he and Congress will work together, but what the fuck have the Democrats done since being put into office in 2006 (well… besides give banks 700 billion dollars… so the banks can keep charging us their exuberhant interest rates).

The list could go on all day calling them out on their bullshit (both are against lobbyists… yet have over millions in donations from them).

Man I miss Kucinich…

I’m curious… what would you ask the candidates?

MP3:
Clit 45 – Bullshitfucking Waste of Time
Raised Fist – Twisted Debate
Armalite – When Nice People Think Dumb Things, Attack, Vote
Paint It Black – Election Day
Against All Authority – Conditioning
Propagandhi – Bullshit Politicians
The Contrary – Bullshit Politics

Buy:
Interpunk

The only remedy for cold mornings like today is a healthy dose of crust punk (although I hear blankets and jackets work pretty well too). My drug of choice today? Philly’s own Witch Hunt (or Philly’s adopted Witch Hunt to be more exact, I believe they were originally from the far superior land of New Jersey).

Heavy as shit shredding guitars, trade-off dude/gal brutal ass vocals, and socio-political intelligent lyrics… Blood Red States was made for days like today. Playing punk/hardcore in the veins of Aus-Rotten and From Ashes Rise, Witch Hunt will definitely satsify your thirst for crust.

MP3:
Witch Hunt – Twenty Five
Witch Hunt – Obscenity

Daily Dose of Crust Articles:
Aus Rotten
From Ashes Rise
Disfear – Live the Storm
Action
Raised Fist

Buy:
Witch Hunt

No band has ever been able to balance the oh so delicate brashness of punk rock, the sporadic beat of gypsy folk, and the complete balls off the walls showmanship of cabaret quite as well as World Inferno Friendship Society.

East Coast Super Sounds of Today opens with possibly the most heart-wrenching World Inferno song ever made (Tattoos Fade), and then dives straight into the cheery beat of Models and Mannequins.

ECSSOT leans more towards World Inferno’s gypsy/cabaret roots so fans of punk who’ve never heard anything by them may want to start with an album such as Red Eyed Soul, but definitely a gem for us fans*.

*Super fans… notice how I didn’t use the word “Infernites”. Anyone who refers to themselves as an “infernite” is a dick.

MP3:
World Inferno Friendship Society – Models and Mannequins
World Inferno Friendship Society – Tattoos Fade

World Class Articles That You Will Read:
Red Eyed Soul
World Inferno Friendship Society – Addicted to Bad Ideas
World Inferno Friendship Society – Just The Best Party
Mischief Brew

Buy:
Amazon

Figures. Two bands that I like are playing on the same day. I could either see Smoke or Fire, or Star Fucking Hipsters. On account I like Smoke or Fire better, and that Static Radio was also on the bill, I opted for Smoke or Fire. I think I made the right choice.

First thing I noticed about the Fire (the unassuming dive in North Philly) was how god damn tiny the place was. Seriously. Put 50 people in there, and it suddenly feels like a slave ship up in that piece. Once the opener “Stay Sharp” started, there were about 15 people watching.

Stay Sharp

Philly melodic hardcore taking cues from Kid Dynamite and The Steal. They played a short, tight set, and were obviously having a blast on stage while doing it, besides the fact that they were having some sound problems.

9:18

Jersey punk band that doesn’t believe in breaks between songs. The crowd swelled to a whopping… 17 when these kids came out, who’s music could be described as awesome punk rock with some sick guitar solos. Good music, but the band didn’t really seem to be enjoying themselves on stage at all, which makes me ask, what’s the point of playing if you’re not having fun?

Static Radio

I’ve read many comments and reviews that claim that Static Radio is disappointing live. Let me say: I don’t know what the fuck these people are smoking. Static Radio completely killed it up there, playing an energetic set for the tiny, unresponsive crowd (well, except for me and one other dude, who were shouting along to every song.) If they come around, definitely check Static Radio out, highly underrated. Highlights of their setlist:

-Marc
-Bothered
-Green Hoodie
-Places
-Wake Up
-Who’s Laughing Now
-One For The Good Guys

Far From Finished

These Boston punk rockers had by far the largest reaction of the night. The band was on top of shit and energetic, with their frontman constantly jumping in the crowds and climbing the bar along the wall, making a face that would make Popeye cringe as he shouted along to the U.S Bombs and Street Dogs influenced punk rock.

Smoke or Fire

Ok, by this point, I was really itching to hear some Smoke or Fire already goddammit. The fact that I was seeing them in an incredible intimate (read: tiny), enviroment just added to my stoked-ness.

Kicking straight into Melatonin (an odd choice for an opener in my opinion), Smoke or Fire didn’t really relent for the rest of the night… well except for the drunk bassist (who’s birthday it happened to be) who felt it necassary to grab the singer’s ass (to which he replied everytime: “I fucking hate you, you fucking scum bag!”)

While it sucked that the setlist got cut short (probably because it was an all age show, although no one under 21 was there), I couldn’t have asked for a better setlist. The played all my favorites.

Setlist (in order):
-Melatonin
-Cops and Drugs
-Culture as Given
-Irish Handcuffs
-What Seperates Us All
-Filter
-Delawhere
-The Patty Hearst Syndrome
-Fire Escapes
-Southpaw
-I’ll Be Gone
-Cryin’ Shame
-Little Bohemia
-California’s Burning

MP3:
Static Radio NJ – Who’s Laughing Now
Smoke or Fire – Southpaw

Also check out these awesome articles… or we’ll murder your children:
Smoke or Fire – Above the City
Static Radio NJ – An Evening of Bad Decisions
Static Radio NJ – One For The Good Guys EP
Fifth Hour Hero
The Steal
Kid Dynamite and the art of moshing everywhere

Buy:
Smoke or Fire
Far From Finished
Static Radio NJ
9:18
Stay Sharp

I love it when artists use literary references in their work. I can just imagine Woody Guthrie sitting on a train thumbing through a copy of The Grapes of Wrath, John Darnielle boning up on his Beowulf or MC Lars donning his monocle to recite some Poe…

Anyone out there have any other favorite literary illusions in songs?

A Pict Song- Billy Brag (A Pict Song, Rudyard Kipling)

Tom Joad Part 1- Woody Guthrie (The Grapes of Wrath, John Steinbeck)
Tom Joad Part 2- Woody Guthrie

Song for Myla Goldberg- The Decemberists (Bee Season, Myla Goldberg)

Grenel’s Mother- The Mountain Goats (Beowulf, Anonymous)

No Joy in Muddville- Death Cab for Cutie (Casey at the Bat, Ernest Thayer)

Popular- Nada Surf (Penny’s Guide to Teen-Age Charm and Popularity, Gloria Winters)

Mr. Raven- MC Lars (The Raven, Edgar Allan Poe)

Wildcard- Pennywise (The name Pennywise comes from a character in It, Steven King)

Lullaby- Lagwagon (Lullaby, Chuck Palahniuk)

Buy: Billy Brag, Woody Guthrie, The Decemberists, The Mountain Goats, Death Cab for Cutie, Nada Surf, MC Lars, Pennywise, Lagwagon